Tag Archives: St. Andrews Cross


My friends hooked me up on a blind date with a Girl called Chanel. She’s very bossy and demanding, they explained, right up your alley. Turned out She was actually somewhat shy and not bossy at all. Not at first anyway. We talked about family, our jobs, favorite dishes, books, movies and hobbies. Hers were shopping (what else), traveling, dancing, cooking and needlework.
Needlework? I sounded surprised. Do you mean embroidery and such?
She looked at me as if I’d just walked out of the Old Testament.
That’s one way of putting it, She slowly said.
Three hours later we endedĀ up at Her place. I don’t know how She did it, man, but She talked me out of my clothes in no time and tied me to a St. Andrews Cross. Must have been the wine, I guess. She then took a long needle from a tray.
Let’s start with the nipples, shall we?
What do you mean!?!
Needlework, She said with a smile.
Ah …
I will also stick a few needles right through your balls, how awesome is that!
I ‘m not sure, I said hesitantly, does it hurt?
She shrugged Her shoulders: I don’t know, I don’t have a scrotum, do I? But not to worry, in case of an energy, I will sew you up.
Screw me up??
Yeah, that as well.