Tag Archives: Men Are Slaves

THE FACESITTING DETECTIVE

It’s easy, as far as I’m concerned: their only goal in life should be to obey Women, work for Women and suffer for Women. Twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week. No ifs, buts or maybes. Simple as that. Sadly enough however, the murky, male world is filled to the brim with egoism, bullshit, laziness, ignorance, arrogance and stupidity. So men are bound to commit crimes, consciously or unconsciously. Not necessarily heinous crimes, but crimes nonetheless. Now, I’m a Lady Detective and I don’t always do things by the book. Well, almost never to be exact. Observation, deduction, research, knowledge of the law, attention to detail and, most of all, time consuming interviews and interrogations are such a waste of time, money and energy, wouldn’t you agree? I don’t have the patience and the right temperament for that. Quick, cheap & simple, that’s My motto. I believe in intuition, gut feeling and the simple fact that we need oxygen to survive. Take away the oxygen and the confessions come marching in. Many a man shits his pants by the thought of My airtight buttocks and confesses immediately. But it can even get weirder. Hundreds and hundreds of them confess to crimes they did not commit! There’s always a queue waiting outside, it’s just mind-boggling. All because they want to suffer beneath My gorgeous ass! Men are weird and awkward creatures, what can I say.
July 2096,  Miss Tanya – Law & Disorder.

FACT OF LIFE

She is elegant, sophisticated and educated. She drives a pair of horses like a charioteer, is at home on a race course or the deck of a fast yacht. She is a power at the theater or the Opera; and none is more brilliant at a dinner party. She dresses with taste, class and style and stops men in their tracks. When She walks everyone follows, when She speaks everyone listens. And obeys. Her voice is calm, direct and powerful. She never shouts, because showing anger is unladylike, and, more importantly, a sign of weakness. When a Lady loses control over Herself, She will effectively lose control over Her slaves. Women are the upper-class of society, which means that Women should always be an example for their slave. Superiority means high quality leadership and high standards. Always. She can be persuasive and manipulative, a seductive huntress who always gets Her prey. She has enslaved hundreds, if not thousands, of men. It’s not even a challenge, because most men are eager to submit. They accept their submissive position and are proud of it. Women are born to rule, just as men are born to submit. It’s not a choice, it’s a fact of life.

SPEAKERS’ CORNER

Yes, I run a tight ship, but I’m doing as nature intended. Because, let’s face it, Harold, you’re a man, a mistake on socks, an arse with teeth. You wouldn’t know what intelligence was, even if it smacked you in the face. But you want to be heard, you say, because you have feelings and desires as well. Now, I’m a reasonable Woman, you know that, so the floor is yours. Speak freely about anything you wish. Let’s hear it, Harold! 
She had Her husband tied to a chair and ball-gagged. He was drooling like a raging river.
Kai-wwaa-gggkk-wwoo-ggeekko.
Good, good, that’s a start. Let it all out, Harold!
He struggled frantically in his ropes and roared like a caged lion.
Ka-ka-goouu.
Good point, love it.
Kaka-fla-kiki-ka.
This went on for half an hour and then he gave up, because he was about to drown in his own drool. Her smiled melted away and huge glaciers moved into Her eyes. Her mood and the temperature in the room changed dramatically.
There’s a valuable lesson to be learned here today, Harold. You’re a slave, and slaves don’t live in a democracy. If you want to be heard, then go to the Speakers’ Corner in Hyde Park on Sunday. For the rest of the time, keep your trap shut and do as you’re told.