It’s easy, as far as I’m concerned: their only goal in life should be to obey Women, work for Women and suffer for Women. Twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week. No ifs, buts or maybes. Simple as that. Sadly enough however, the murky, male world is filled to the brim with egoism, bullshit, laziness, ignorance, arrogance and stupidity. So men are bound to commit crimes, consciously or unconsciously. Not necessarily heinous crimes, but crimes nonetheless. Now, I’m a Lady Detective and I don’t always do things by the book. Well, almost never to be exact. Observation, deduction, research, knowledge of the law, attention to detail and, most of all, time consuming interviews and interrogations are such a waste of time, money and energy, wouldn’t you agree? I don’t have the patience and the right temperament for that. Quick, cheap & simple, that’s My motto. I believe in intuition, gut feeling and the simple fact that we need oxygen to survive. Take away the oxygen and the confessions come marching in. Many a man shits his pants by the thought of My airtight buttocks and confesses immediately. But it can even get weirder. Hundreds and hundreds of them confess to crimes they did not commit! There’s always a queue waiting outside, it’s just mind-boggling. All because they want to suffer beneath My gorgeous ass! Men are weird and awkward creatures, what can I say.
July 2096,  Miss Tanya – Law & Disorder.

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