Tag Archives: Femdom Gag

KINKY CUISINE

A few weeks ago I found a recipe in a vintage Women’s Weekly magazine. It’s called Soup a la Lingerie. Easy to make and packed with flavour. The ingredients are:
  • a panty (preferably the one you’re currently wearing)
  • duct tape
  • handcuffs or rope
  • a bowl
  • a full bladder
  • an idiot, also known as a male creature
Now, tell the empty bottle, the idiot that is, to kneel down and cuff, or tie, his hands behind his back. It does not affect the taste of the soup, but it’s a nice addition. It’s like putting the kettle on, one might say. Next, take off your gorgeous panty and put it in a bowl. Squat over it and take a long hot piss. Soak that panty, drown it and let it suck up all the juice. Season it, if you like, with a bit of spit or a good old-fashioned fart. Tell the creature to open wide and stuff the soaked panty in his mouth. Wrap some duct tape around his head a few times to make sure that nothing goes to waste.
Let him simmer for about two to three hours. He’s been such a good boy (or not), he deserves it (or not). Pinch his nose from time to time if you want to put up the heat. You can also add certain naughty ingredients if you want. Faceslapping for example (aka stirring), carrots up his nose, broccoli in his ears (aka side dishes); anything goes. Well, that’s all for today on ‘Kinky Cuisine’.
Next time: roasted testicles in penis sauce.

SPEAKERS’ CORNER

Yes, I run a tight ship, but I’m doing as nature intended. Because, let’s face it, Harold, you’re a man, a mistake on socks, an arse with teeth. You wouldn’t know what intelligence was, even if it smacked you in the face. But you want to be heard, you say, because you have feelings and desires as well. Now, I’m a reasonable Woman, you know that, so the floor is yours. Speak freely about anything you wish. Let’s hear it, Harold! 
She had Her husband tied to a chair and ball-gagged. He was drooling like a raging river.
Kai-wwaa-gggkk-wwoo-ggeekko.
Good, good, that’s a start. Let it all out, Harold!
He struggled frantically in his ropes and roared like a caged lion.
Ka-ka-goouu.
Good point, love it.
Kaka-fla-kiki-ka.
This went on for half an hour and then he gave up, because he was about to drown in his own drool. Her smiled melted away and huge glaciers moved into Her eyes. Her mood and the temperature in the room changed dramatically.
There’s a valuable lesson to be learned here today, Harold. You’re a slave, and slaves don’t live in a democracy. If you want to be heard, then go to the Speakers’ Corner in Hyde Park on Sunday. For the rest of the time, keep your trap shut and do as you’re told.