Tag Archives: Ball Torture


Jingle balls, jingle balls
Jingle all the way!
Oh what fun it is to squeeze them every single day

May the miracle of Christmas bring you joy and happiness, slave. And pain, of course. Now, listen up, you empty sock, I’ve been thinking about a Christmas present for you. Isn’t that sweet?
He smiled and opened his mouth.
Shut the fuck up, She snapped, or I’ll knock you unconscious!
His mouth fell shut and he heard Her sigh.
So, a Christmas present. I wish I could give you a brain, that would be cool, wouldn’t it? From a hamster or so, nothing fancy. Just something to fill up the vast emptiness between your ears.
She shook Her head.
No such luck. Or what about a bigger dick! That’s priority number 1, I would say, because that thing between your legs … I mean, that’s just an embarrassment. And these – She grabbed him by the balls and squeezed them hard – what the fuck are these?
He danced up and down in pain: My b-a-a-a-a-l-l-s! Please, aargh!
What’s the matter with you! Can’t you be a little more Christmas-y? Come on then, let’s do a singsong: Jingle Balls, Jingle Balls, Jingle all the way …
She squeezed his balls even harder and dug Her sharp nails into the weak flesh.
I’m waiting Christmas boy, let me hear you!!
Jesus, so much for a Silent Night, man.


Selma jumped off the couch and I Usain Bolted to the toilet and locked myself in. Now, you have to know that one of my ancestors was in Napoleon’s army during the Russian campaign of 1812. He wrote his last letter from Butkiškė, Lithuania, never to be heard of again. Only the letter survived. His brother fought against Napoleon at Waterloo in 1815 and lived to tell the tale. And here I was, a descendant of these battle-hardened men, cowering in a fucking water loo. I opened the door ajar and waved some toilet paper up and down. Selma told me it was safe to come out. I wasn’t too convinced though, because She could be a mean, brutish, cruel, merciless and barbaric bitch sometimes. But then again, you can’t live in a toilet for the rest of your life, so I opene –
She grabbed me by the balls and twisted them viciously. Like sticking your nuts in a mixer.
Selma-ah-ah-aa. I danced up and down like a frog on a hot plate.
Next time you’ll do as you’re told, won’t you?
Yes, yes, I give you my wo-aaa-ord.
She squeezed even harder and my voice reached the high C. She was more deadly than a demolition squad, no question about it.
Don’t let it happen again, She hissed.
She let go of my balls. I fell down on my knees and sobbed in pain.
My ancestors turned in their graves.