Tag Archives: She’s In Charge


On 31 March the enormous siege towers were wheeled against the north wall of the city of Kalanbash ad Hattenfrat and after days of fierce fighting the attackers breached the walls and stormed into the city. The victorious emperor Alfred (aka Big Al) was a cruel, depraved, sadistic tyrant and he ordered his troops to ransack and loot the city, enslave the young and kill the old. He was a nasty piece of work, what can I say. Within hours the victors, including Alfred himself, were dripping with blood from head to foot. After a hard day’s work he returned to his huge tent (477 m² in 67 separate rooms). His wife Elma was not pleased, not pleased at all.
I told you to be home at six o’clock, She fumed, and you decided to ignore Me!
I’m so sorry sweetie pie, he said all shy and timid, but I had such a love-
Shut your mouth! I’m not interested in your lame excuses. 
Pumpkin! I’m the emperor!
So? I’m the Goddess. Or did that slip your mind? Mmm?
N-no, of course not, he whispered.
Good! Pants down and bend over.
Elma, please!! What will the men think of me!
What did you just call Me?
The threat in Her voice was unmistakable.
Goddess Elma, I’m sorry, I meant Goddess.
I don’t care about your soldiers, do you hear? I can parade you through the city on a leash and no one would dare to say anything. Because behind every great man is a Woman with a whip. Don’t ever forget that.
Kalanbash ad Hattenfrat, July 1099